Why do Auctioneers Talk so Fast?

Every time we need an example of someone who speaks ridiculously quickly, we tend to turn to auctioneers. These machine-gun-mouthed ramblebots are capable of slinging some serious verbiage in your direction extraordinarily fast. But why do auctioneers talk so fast?

According to Slate, this is done in order to keep audiences and potential buyers in a certain state of trance. The monotone they use is intentional – not a byproduct of their speed. This tone and word vomit velocity force bidders to follow as closely as they can, potentially influencing their ability to make well thought out decisions before impulsively lifting their little bid flags.

It’s also a great way to make more money for the auction house. The more products you move, the more you make.

The average, conversational speed for most English speakers is between 120 and 150 words per minute. This number goes up or down depending on context, of course. Presentations and speeches and stuff tend to go a little slower while emotionally charged interactions can be a bit quicker.

Auctioneers, on the other hand, speak at around 250 words per minute.

Not to be outdone, though, commentators for events such as horse racing, among other things, can at times equal or even surpass auctioneers in speed. I find this potentially more impressive as the auctioneer’s job consists primarily of just taking numbers and doesn’t really call for the more in-depth analysis of the situation required of a commentator. You’re welcome to dispute that.

All of these facts and figures are based on the English language – others may, and likely do, feature different rates at which words are expectorated!

One of the world’s fastest [English] talkers, however, blows both of these professions out of the water. British comedian Steven Woodmore has clocked in at a blazing 637 words per minute, more than double that of an auctioneer.

Except, he’s not the world record holder.

Canadian Sean Shannon has held that title since he beat Woodmore in 1995. The Guinness Book of World Records recorded him at an absolutely ablation-inducing1I’m running out of adjectives with which to adequately describe these speeds. 655 words per minute.

And would I mention this without offering proof? Of course I wouldn’t!

Here he, is doing that:

Cool, huh?

So think about this the next time you go to complain about why Spanish speakers talk so fast.

This mini-post originally appeared in my larger piece, How Many Words Will You Speak in a Lifetime.